Turns out, I'm just doing my part

It has long amazed me the bad manners rampant in this world.  One of the worst offenses to me are the inevitable child questions.  You know "do you have them?"  "will you have them?"  "why do you only have 1?" Why don't you just ask me how often I sleep with my husband in the carnal sense?  I mean seriously, it is just as personal.  If not more.  I recently lost my temper with a long acquaintance.  The past two times I went to the diner I used to waitress at during college I was asked by the same person about giving my daughter a sibling.  The first time I smiled and refused to answer.  She would have chased me out of the restaurant asking if another customer hadn't come up to pay.  The second time I put my finger in her face and snapped "this is none of your business and I am NOT discussing it."  Super.  Now I'm a crazy person. 

Having children, not having children, how many you have, if you can even have any is one of the most personal decisions a woman can make.  Sometimes the decision is out of our hands, miscarriage, infertility, and so on.  I have friends who have gone to incredible lengths to have children and have had amazing conversations with them on the topic.  I have also had enlightening conversations with women with multiple children.  Quite a few of our friends are childless.  There is one constant.  They are all our friends...period.  Granted, some friends are not child fans, so we do not see as much of them now, 'cause you know, we have one.  But whatever our friends' choices are on that front are not our concern, unless we are invited in.  Not one of my friends have gotten in my face like so many others have about whether Mark and I have "enough" children.  I have it at work, and now, apparently at eating establishments as well.  That's why I love my friends. 

I learned something new today concerning women's choice: turns out, I'm just doing my part to help defuse the population bomb.  I will not go into explanation here where Mark and I are at, because, as mentioned before, I really do not think it is anyone's business.  However, now I can perhaps stump some people or at least get them off topic.  Of course, I have found that the same people who rudely persist are the same that are unable to pick up on your verbal and non-verbal cues that it is time to stop now. (It is? Time to stop now. Mack?...20 points to anyone who gets that movie reference). 

In summary.  I have one child.  I love her like nothing else on this Earth.  I have two nephews and one niece.  I love them to pieces.  I also adore my friends and my friends' children.  I am smitten with my friends who have no children.  I seriously do not believe I'm controlling world population, nor should I.  But I'm still looking for a clever way to get away from the rude questions.  Without crying or yelling at people of course.  For now, I'll just pretend I'm doing my part for the Earth.  Sounds good, right?


Anonymous said…
Gah, wordpress just ate my comment.

I agree with you. It's no one's business! I usually say, "we haven't decided" and change the subject. UGH.

I love you and your family. We should get the girls together again soon!
Bryden78 said…
I get that all the time. But it's usually, "oh, you'll change your mind". Adria is almost 8. I'm pretty sure by now...thanks

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